The transition into nursery life is a significant milestone for any family. While the focus often lies in the practicalities of bags and spare clothes, the emotional core of this experience lies in the relationship between your child and their assigned staff member. This specific professional is responsible for ensuring your child feels secure, happy, and understood while you are away.
Many parents wonder how they can best support their child’s progress through these daily interactions. Understanding the role of the nursery key person is the first step toward a successful partnership. These educators do not just supervise play; they also observe developmental milestones, support emotional regulation, and serve as the primary point of contact for families.
Daily pick-ups are the perfect time to strengthen this bond. While it is tempting to stick to the basics of eating and sleeping, asking deeper questions can provide a clearer picture of your toddler’s social and emotional world.
The Importance of the Key Person Approach
The Department for Education’s Statutory Framework for the Early Years Foundation Stage (EYFS) mandates that every child in a registered setting must be assigned a specific practitioner. This requirement is grounded in attachment theory, suggesting that children learn best when they have a secure base to return to. In a busy room, having one person who knows exactly how your child prefers to be comforted or what their specific cues for tiredness look like is invaluable.
According to a survey, 72% of parents rate the quality of local childcare as good. Much of this satisfaction stems from the trust built through the key person model. Furthermore, recent data from the 2025 Childcare and Early Years Provider Survey indicates that despite a slight decrease in the total number of providers, the workforce remains stable, with group-based settings continuing to prioritise the individualised care that this role provides.
To make the most of the short handover at the end of the day, consider these five questions.
1. How did they interact with their peers today?
As toddlers move from parallel play to more interactive social experiences, their nursery environment becomes a laboratory for social skills. Asking about peer interaction goes beyond knowing if they were “good.” It helps you understand if they are beginning to share, how they handle conflict, and who their preferred playmates are.
Your child’s educator can tell you whether they joined in a group song or chose to lead a game in the sandpit. These small details offer a glimpse into their emerging personality and confidence levels within a group setting.
2. What sparked their curiosity during play?
Instead of asking what they did, ask what they loved. Nursery settings are filled with different “stations,” from sensory water play to construction blocks. Learning which activity captured their attention for the longest time helps you mirror those interests at home.
The nursery key person is trained to notice these sparks of interest. If your toddler spent forty minutes focused on “painting” with water on the pavement outside, you know that they are currently fascinated by cause and effect or mark-making. This information allows you to provide similar stimulating activities during the weekend.
3. How did they handle any challenges or frustrations?
Toddlers are famously still learning how to manage big emotions. Whether it was a struggle to put on a coat or a minor disagreement over a wooden train, these moments are vital learning opportunities.
Knowing how your child’s educator supported them through a difficult moment gives you a consistent language to use at home. If the nursery uses specific phrases to help children “use their words” or take deep breaths, using those same techniques at home provides a sense of continuity that makes life easier for everyone.
4. Are there any new skills or milestones you noticed?
Because toddlers spend a significant portion of their waking hours at nursery, the staff often witness “firsts” that might happen while you are at work. This could be a physical milestone, like jumping with two feet off the ground, or a cognitive one, like identifying a new colour.
These observations are part of the formal tracking required by the EYFS. By asking this question, you ensure that you are part of the celebration. It also helps you stay informed about their “Next Steps,” which are small developmental goals the staff set to help your child progress at their own pace.
5. Is there anything from home that could help them tomorrow?
Communication is a two-way street. Your child’s educator benefits from knowing if your toddler had a restless night, is teething, or has a new favourite book.
Asking this question shows that you value their expertise and are committed to a partnership. It might be that bringing in a family photo for the “home corner” would help them feel more settled, or perhaps sharing the name of a new pet would give the staff a great conversation starter for the next morning.
Making Time for the Conversation
The “pick-up rush” is a real phenomenon. With a queue of parents behind you and a tired toddler at your feet, a long chat is often impossible. However, quality matters more than quantity. If you find that the handover is always too hurried, you can ask if there is a better time for a brief phone call or if you can send a message through the nursery’s parent app. Most providers are happy to schedule a longer catch-up if you have specific concerns or want a more detailed update on their progress.
Building this relationship takes time, but it is one of the most effective ways to ensure your child feels safe and happy. When a child sees their parent and their educator talking warmly and sharing information, it reinforces the idea that the nursery is a safe extension of their home. This sense of security is the foundation upon which all their future learning will be built.